"SHOES"... to make a difference.

Saturday, May 5, 2012

All proceeds earned in May will benefit Kingston Interval House. Catch Greg's walk at the Cataraqui Town Centre. Become a sponsor by clicking on the link below to Walkamilekingston, and donating to "SHOES... to make a difference".

RED SHOE DIARIES:


My goal is to raise $200.00.

"SOLE MATE" level donations ($20.00):

Kelly P. of Kingston
Charles F. of Kingston
Paul L. of Hillier, ON
Charles L. of Brockville ($30.00)


Total so far: $90.00

"ARCH-SUPPORTERS" level donations ($10.00):

None so far.
http://walkamilekingston.ca/

TOP TELEVISION SHOWS (ALL-TIME)

The Office (BBC)

THE OFFICE (Ricky Gervais, Stephen Merchant), BBC, UK

THE NEWSROOM (Ken Finkelman), CBC, Canada

MADE IN CANADA, Canada, theme song: Blow at High Dough, The Hip

Gross, and Diefenbaker

DUE SOUTH (Paul Gross, Paul Haggis), Canada, awesome Canadian music

THE OFFICE (Steve Carell), NBC, USA

HILL STREET BLUES, NBC, USA

MONTY PYTHON'S FLYING CIRCUS, BBC, UK

John Candy, Eugene Levy, et al

S.C.T.V. (John Candy, Rick Moranis, Eugene Levy, Martin Short, Dave Thomas, etc.), CBC, Canada

The Kids in the Hall

THE KIDS IN THE HALL (Scott Thompson, Mark Kinney, etc.), CBC, Canada

THE RICK MERCER REPORT (Rick Mercer), CBC, Canada

THIS HOUR HAS 22 MINUTES, CBC, Canada

THE GOOD WIFE, CBS, USA

SIX FEET UNDER, HBO, USA

FAWLTY TOWERS (John Cleese), BBC, UK

TITANIC DINNER AT THE RENAISSANCE

Table Numer Two

 The Renaissance held a Titanic dinner last Thursday night. I was lucky enough to serve. The guests dressed up as passengers from 1912. I was telling them: If you survive tonight? NEVER bet on the Leafs. And if you like to play the stock market... avoid Studebaker. And 1929? A little bumpy.

Parking lot scene, after dinner

F**K !!! F**K!!!! F**K!!!

In the parking lot of La Salle Secondary School there sat a kid at the wheel of a parked car, listening to VERY LOUD and VERY OBNOXIOUS rap music. The bass was making the ground shake. I walked up to the drivers side window and knocked. He rolled down the window. I yelled:

"COULD YOU PLEASE TURN THAT UP!!? THAT'S MY FAVOURITE SONG FROM THAT ALBUM!! I LOVE THE LYRICS!! THE FIRST F**K IS KIND OF PREDICTABLE, BUT THE NEXT FIFTY-THREE F**KS..?  SHEER GENIUS!!"





Music Lover from la Salle

I started to walk away, but went back with: "WAS THAT THEIR CHRISTMAS ALBUM!!?"

BEST MOVIES EVER

The 3-D version of Titanic just sent the total earnings for the movie over $1 Bazillion. Only two movies have ever, in the history of movies, earned more than $1 Bazillion: Titanic and Avatar. Both are directed by James Cameron. Both have one word titles. And both are NOT on my list of BEST EVER.

TOP TEN (no particular order):

"The Soggy Bottom Boys"

O BROTHER, WHERE ART THOU? (The Coen Brothers) 2000
    Awesome music. Funny. The Coen brothers. John Goodman. George Clooney's first movie role. John Goodman has been used in more Coen movies than any other actor. 

Perry, and Jack

THE FISHER KING (Terry Gilliam) 1991
    Jeff Bridges, my favourite actor. Robin Williams. Mercedes Ruehl in an Academy Award performance.
    Amanda Plummer, daughter of Christopher. Harry Shearer in a cameo. And David Hyde Pierce.
    

LIFE OF BRIAN (Monty Python) 1979
     Irreverent. Clever. Smart. The absurdity of religious beliefs and prejudices. Banned in Scotland.

DOCTOR STRANGELOVE (Stanley Kubrick) 1964
     Peter Sellers playing three, very different, roles. Clever. Funny. Chilling. "Gentlemen. This is the war room. You cannot fight in the war room".

LAWRENCE OF ARABIA (David Lean) 1962
     Peter O'Toole. Alec Guiness. Anthony Quinn. The desert. Omar Sharif's first role because he could ride
     camel. Breathtaking cinematography.

THE HALLELUJAH TRAIL (John Sturges) 1965
     Campy. Good, clean fun. Burt Lancaster in a comic role. Martin Landau as an Indian. Horribly incorrect. 

FORREST GUMP (Robert Zemeckis) 1994
     Tom Hanks. Good music.

Some People Call Me... "TIM"

MONTY PYTHON and the HOLY GRAIL (Monty Python) 1975
     Irreverent. Clever. Smart. Coconuts for horses. Killer bunnies. Tim.

"The boys" in full regalia

THIS IS SPINAL TAP (Rob Reiner) 1984
     Reiner's first movie. Mockumentary. "Love Pump". "Sex Farm". Those are song titles. From the album, Sniff the Glove. The band still tours. Harry Shearer is the guy on the left. He has a cameo in The Fisher King. As does David Hyde Pierce.

RANGO (Gore Verbinski) 2011
     Johnny Depp's voice. "The Hero of the West" appears near the end. Very funny. References EVERY
     western ever filmed.Only animated movie on the list.

WHEN HARRY MET SALLY (Rob Reiner, again)
     "I'll have what she's having." Spoken by Rob Reiner's mother. Best line ever in a movie. Billy Crystal. Meg Ryan (before the botox). Clever. That's eleven movies. MY amplifier goes up to eleven.

SWIMMING TO CAMBODIA (Jonathan Demme)

Our muse

    Starring... who else? Spalding Gray.

HISTORIC ANNIVERSARY OF THE TITANIC

Today is an historic anniversary, indeed. Unless you live under a rock, you will already know this. Today is the anniversary of the Titanic. Fifteen years, four months, and seventeen days ago on this day in 1997 James Cameron launched his "unsinkable" motion picture, "Titanic". It has been called one of the greatest Maureen disasters in history. Maureen is my sister and she loves good movies. Maureen went to see "Titanic" on its opening day, and she was horribly disappointed. She called it an unmitigated disaster. "Typical Hollywood ending," she wrote at the time," The big boat sinks. Entirely predictable. I could see it coming a mile away." In her scathing review, she goes on to say that the whole plot was basically unbelievable. "Sure!!" she taunted Mr. Cameron, "Pull the other one!!" She also pointed out that the Leonardo DiCaprio line: "I'm KING of the world!!" was stolen from an Academy Awards acceptance speech. 

In tomorrow's blog, I will speak with actual living survivors... people whose love of great film survived the bombastic and gratuitous vehicle known to the world as "Titanic". I speak to, for example, Clara Hutson in Belleville, ON, about how she managed to escape from the theatre before the start of the second act. She will tell us about the usher who tried to stop her, saying: "It's women and children first!!" (Clara is not the most attractive of women... I say that, not to insult her, but to explain the usher's confusion. She decided to pass as an eight year old child rather than to try to prove her gender to him.)

Watch for our 3-D blog on Saturday. Get your glasses from neighbour's recycling box. If you want free SUNglasses, just call me. I have lots.  

MISUNDERSTANDING

My grandfather was a survivor of the Titanic sinking in 1912. There is no truth at all to the rumour that he somehow cheated to get himself on a lifeboat. His story that he fainted and woke up in Halifax seems credible to me. Here is a picture of Poppa right after waking up in Canada.

K. L. Milledge, Titanic survivor

LATEST NEWS--- from CNN

Before the U.S. Coast Guard could finish the shelling, and deliberate sinking, of the derelict Japanese trawler (whose name translates as: "Le Club de Hockey Canadien"), it hit an iceberg. Miraculously, no one died. This can be attributed to two things: Japanese tenacity, and the fact that the ship was already deserted.

SHUFFLE

Not really MY iPod

1. ECHOES (Pink Floyd), from
   Echoes (Disc One)

Rebuild the Wall

(If you have not heard the Luther Wright and the Wrongs country version of The Wall, then you have not lived, yet. Check out the video, on YouTube, for the song The Wall.)

2. BEAUTIFUL (Gordon Lightfoot), from
   Complete Greatest Hits

(This song can also be heard on the Margot & Greg Wedding CD. Greg is, of course, the Lightfoot fan. Seen him a few times. Several times at Massey Hall. The latest time at the N.A.C. in Ottawa. He wrote many great songs. This would be one of his best love songs. Originally recorded on "Don Quixote".)

3. NEW ORLEANS IS SINKING (The Tragically Hip), from
   Up To Here

Not Bananaskins

(Finally got to see The Hip when they opened the K-Rock Centre. The road right in front of the arena has just been re-named "The Tragically Hip Way". I wanted them to play at Bananaskins one New Year's Eve. I met Paul in the beer store and I asked him what they were doing New Year's? He said: The A.C.C., I think. I asked if it was BOOKED yet, and he said: Yes. So we were looking for a Hip replacement.)

4. I DON'T REMEMBER (Peter Gabriel), from
   Shaking the Tree: 16 Golden Greats

(I WAS going to say something.... but...)

5. THE HAPPIEST DAYS OF OUR LIVES (Pink Floyd). from
   Echoes (Disc One)

6. TIME (Pink Floyd), from
   Echoes (Disc Two)

7. THE DARKEST ONE (The Tragically Hip), from
   Yer Favourites (Disc Two)

(Paul Langlois worked for me at Red Lobster. The definition of a Kingstonian is: Someone who knows someone in The Hip. A Canadian is: Someone who knows someone in the N.H.L. Chris Rock also got his start at Red Lobster. But not in Kingston.)

8. BIG TIME (Peter Gabriel), from
   Shaking the Tree: 16 Golden Greats

9. NOT FADE AWAY (The Crickets), from

Buddy Holly

   Buddy Holly Greatest Hits (Original Recording Remastered)

(The Stones cover of this song was their first hit. We once marked The Day the Music Died at Frank Vetere's by featuring a drink called "The Bloody Holly".)

10. SULTANS OF SWING (Dire Straits), from
   Money for Nothing

This Is Us

(I still remember where I was when I first heard this song. I thought it was Bob Dylan singing. I have since become a big Mark Knopfler fan. His duet with Emmy Lou Harris, "This Is Us", was a song featured at our wedding. I think we will call our wedding book "THIS IS US".)

BREAKING NEWS

Dean of the School of Piracy

SOMALIS WANT DERELICT:

The Mogadishu Pirate Academy (M.P.A.) is a school in Somalia that trains Somalis for a life of adventure on the "high" seas as pirates. It offers both two year diplomas as well as four year degrees. Today the M.P.A. announced that it wishes to use the drifting Japanese freighter as a training vessel for its Graduate Student Programme. The school is deliberately not telling the U.S. Coast Guard of its plans, so as to provide a more realistic test for its graduates.

DERELICT TO BE SUNK BY U.S. COAST GUARD: --CNN News Report

There is a rusty, abandonned Japanese freighter that is drifting aimlessly in the Pacific Ocean off the west coast of Canada. It has been on the high seas for more than one year with no one at the helm. It was, before the massive earthquake and tsunamis, a productive and profitable shrimper. It has been at sea without captain, or crew, and now the U.S. Coast Guard wants to shell, and sink, it. The Japanese name of the vessel translates, roughly, to: "LE CLUB de HOCKEY CANADIEN."

That's disturbing...

Someone DID find this blog by Googling "WOMEN, NAKED, BLOOD". Hmmmmm...... Did not mean to disappoint you.....